My mom friends have all been checking in on me for the past few days. It’s sweet. I think they were really worried I went into labor early and forgot to tell them. Highly unlikely ladies. Rest assured, I’ll be happy to tell you when my son or daughter’s feet have been removed from my ribs.
But because it’s Monday and well, Mondays are just annoying even if the weather outside is delightful, I decided to move my “to do before labor” list aside for a few minutes (like 60) and check up on some cool moms. Of course, now I feel the need to take it upon myself to let you all know what is going on with them.
I’ll probably get into a bit of trouble because it seems like my snark-o-meter is on the high dial today but who gives a strawberry cupcake. I have less than a week to go people!
Let’s begin, shall we …
Tracey has always had a better body than me. I’ve known it since she came up to me at a party last year and introduced herself. I’m fully aware I have hips. Not the oh-so-trendy curves of America Ferrera pre-Ugly Betty. I have hips. Good ones for “birthing babies”. So I’ll never be able to pull off the outfits Tracey wears or the lack of outfits you see in her bio photo on my website. But today, all out pre-natal rage jealousy set in as I saw her newest website photo of her lying on a beach in a gorgeous bikini. Sure, I’m due in a week (think beached whale) and she’s not pregnant but it doesn’t seem to matter in my little desperate to be induced brain.
[check in: traceymallett.com]
I begged Whitney to take me on her family vacation. Just me. With her family. Forgetting about my two little ones and the “any day now” birth of my third little one. I haven’t had a family vacation in 3 and a half years so forgive my crazy thoughts which were apparently so crazy, Whitney responded to my desperate plea for a vaca – any vaca … with silence.
[check in: mommieswithstyle.com]
Don’t worry Liz, my daughter has worn jeans from Old Navy. Or maybe it was H&M but to be honest, any mom who is going to scan and judge my daughter’s clothing in order to determine whether we fit into their label crazy mommy playgroup is a mom I don’t want to be around. That probably explains my lack of attendance at the many across the city who have extended self serving invites to me.
[check in: mom-101.blogspot.com]
Jessica was nice enough to forgive me earlier when I cancelled our lunch plans for later this week. They were scheduled for the exact same time I was having my son’s celebratory 2nd birthday lunch! Clearly realizing I’m insane but still a nice person to know so she just responded saying “You’re pregnant, you have mommy brain!” which is a really nice way of saying “Idiot, this better be your last kid if you have trouble remembering their birthdays.”
[check in: zenmomma.com]
Bunmi has a secret. One I won’t divulge because I wouldn’t want La Leche coming after me for not getting on her case about it. But what I can share is the fact we shouldn’t be allowed to have high tea together. We apparently aren’t civilized ladies. And should stay a full coast apart from each other in order to prevent all the wickedness which will undoubtedly ensue.
[check in: mommyscompany.com]
My friend Jess ran track in high school and through most of college so she has a few more years experience when it comes to running and sweating and doing crazy things most of us would never even think of doing. I reminded her two weeks ago that in November I would be running the ING New York City Marathon. This morning, I mentioned it again when I emailed asking her to email me work stuff. She is definitely shocked I still plan on running it. Hmmm.. maybe she can stand in for me.
[check in: hotmomsclub.com]
