Archive for May, 2009

Dont Try to Fix It

I can’t sleep.

I keep thinking I’m going to get a phone call from that company that employs computer nerds by the poundfull telling me they tried everything they could but they just couldn’t save any information from my laptop.

My less than a year old laptop.

The sole source of bread and butter for my children (and after taking a look at the scale, you can include me in enjoying that bread and butter - but thats another story) up and broke yesterday.  More accurately, the screen up and cracked in two places.

A little back story - for the last six weeks I’ve been traveling for work so much I rarely backed up my laptop and I’m in the middle of a few big projects. Yeah, my fault, I know. I get it. So this whole no laptop thing is giving me grey more grey stress beyond belief.

I take the laptop to the local Nerd Herd (yes, I watch Chuck, what of it) and I’m told laptops don’t crack on their own and I had to have broken it myself.  You’re right, it didn’t crack. The damn thing popped — like a popcorn POP — and the screen split.  In front of my eyes. When all I wanted to do was open the laptop and log in to Twitter, check email and open the latest MS Word document file needing my attention.

Then the genius (not to be confused with a Mac Genius because I haven’t moved out of the Jurassic era and just bought a Macbook already!) asked me if I threw it or dropped it. No dude didn’t you hear me!  He pulls up my information in the computer and asks “Why do you have two last names?”  First, I dont. Secondly, have you never heard of people with two last names? Third, PERICON and INC are not two last names.  You put my first name in front of it and you get my company name. Can you not read the screen?! I’m worried if you can’t read that screen in front of you. And last, who cares!!!??? Just work on my computer already. Wait, I’m not sure I want you to. Just hand it off to someone who can help me.

By this time, I’m nervous handing over the source of livelyhood for my family to the only nitwit working at the time.  And the best part is yet to come - I’m then told my insurance doesn’t cover my laptop issue because its not possible that the laptop screen split on its own.  Yeah, batteries blow up. Harddrives die.  But LCD screens cannot act up. Uh huh. Sure.

He says I have to pay out of pocket and they’ll send it to Kentucky or Arkansas or Detroit. At this point, all I remember is that its somewhere not in zip code 10028.  And he says he’ll have to give me an estimate since I have so many GBs on the laptop. An estimate? Really? ok… so I think quickly and ask him to just take all my information off the laptop. All the files, put it on the bubble gum pink external hard drive I brought with me and call it a day. Thats it. Just take all my stuff and save it.

Why pay to repair the laptop when laptops are so inexpensive nowadays (Long gone are the days where I need to spend over $1500 on a PC laptop.) I’ve decided to buy a new one (yes, still not moving over to Mac) and just put all the old files onto it.

He gets this piece of paper and asks which files I want to save. Um, all of them. And where my files are saved Um, everywhere. I tell him the MS Word documents, my photos (of my kids! and business trips!) and video (from work!!) are the most important after he saves my MS Outlook .pst files because I need all my work emails. 

But then he asks me if I have any porn on my laptop that he should save?  What? I just told him I was all about work. He offers this tidbit “Four people a week come in here asking for us to specifically save their porn. It means so much to them.”  Call me a prude but what???

Anyway, my laptop is “in good hands” and on Thursday I get to pick it up with my precious files. I didn’t pay the extra $400 to pick it up this evening. Didn’t make sense. I’m already being forced to spend money unnecessarily because they think I broke my laptop by throwing it against a wall or something. 

This whole laptop situation is driving me to want to eat more shovel food in my month. Yes, I said it even after declaring my middle name should be Orca I’m bursting at the seams. There’s no hope for me. None.

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Next stop – Picking up my laptop then transfering the files from the external hard drive to the new laptop (which I haven’t bought yet - any suggestions?) finding a new school for Luke and Harrison (a story for another day!) and then taking Miss Nat to her first Tai Kwan Do class — yet another story.

Car Song – “Um, did you back up your data?” Aidan to Carrie in Sex and the City

Bursting at the Seams

*standing up*

My name is Victoria and I have a problem.

A really big fat one.

This morning when I stepped on the scale, it became very clear to me.  (It’s probably been clear to my friends for some time now.)

I’ve been overeating.

And my weight has become a problem.

A problem to the tune of over 20 pounds.

I now weigh more than I did when I left the hospital after having Harrison two years ago.

I have noticed my body looking different in the mirror but I’ve been traveling for work and not really thinking about my weight.  Because well, I was working and just thinking about getting the job done well.  And after working really long days, if something tasted really good, why not let myself eat all of it off my plate? After working really hard, why not enjoy dessert.

Everyone who travels on business, knows eating right while traveling is ever easy.  It’s not like I don’t know what I should be doing. I know the healthiest dining options are the ones you can control - like meals from your own kitchen.  I know portion sizes for one shouldn’t be able to feed a family of four.

Its not like I’ve been eating Big Macs and drinking Big Gulps either. In fact, I’ve been having neither. I don’t even eat fried food. Or fast food. But the (get ready for the excuses) editor lunches, product launches and work dinners are getting to me and I’m packing on the pounds because I’m not eating healthy foods in moderation.

I’m so embarrased.  After seeing the number on the scale I wanted to cry. And as I write this, I keep telling myself if I don’t write it and ask for help, I will continue on this unhealthy path I am on. And this makes me want to cry.

How could I let myself go?  Especially knowing I’m in the wrong career to be overweight not be able to fit into my wardrobe.  And especially since I can’t buy an entire new work wardrobe along with new clothes to wear when I don’t have five pounds of HD TV makeup on my face.

And now I’m even worried that this new body size of mine is stretching out the clothing in my old size and ruining those clothes. I can’t believe I’ve let this happen.  This is the dumbest thing I’ve ever done. And trust me, I’ve done dumb a plenty.

I need someone who knows and loves me to intervene (can you ask for an intervention?) because I am clearly not strong enough to wake up and stop on my own even after seeing the number on the scale. I need help from friends, family, people I don’t even know.  Anyone with a heart. Someone who has been here before.

I don’t even know what to ask you to do. If you see me drinking anything besides water just remind me how I feel today.  I won’t get upset.  If you see me eat something besides celery at an event would you please scowl at me.  I need all the help I can get with this weight loss.

Stop being my friend by pretending I look good when you know my middle name has become Orca overnight.  Be my friend and realize if I get a phone call about my weight being an issue again, I’m going to be living on your couch with my kidlets. Yeah, you don’t want that.  Because then I will be all mopey about losing work and just eat everything out of your cupboards more because I’m unemployed, stressed and worried.

And now because what is life without a bit of irony - I won a trial membership from New York Sports Club yesterday just by spinning a prize wheel outside the gym. I wasn’t on my way inside the gym. Was walking by with Miss Nat while doing errands. I’m going to walk into the gym on Friday morning. Hopefully it will be the beginning of me getting back on track. 

I’ll be honest. I’m so lazy when it comes to fitness. I’m getting older and I can’t rely on what everyone says is good genes to let me ignore my health. I always thought I could eat whatever I wanted and not have to go into a gym and work or go on a diet to be the size I was happy to be. Those days are over.

I’m Fat. So help me. Somehow. Some way. Pretty please.  I’ll be your best friend.  I just don’t want to be your overweight best friend.

—–

Want to follow me on this amazing road trip I call my life? Subscribe to the Veep Veep RSS feed.

Can’t wait until I check in again from the road? Follow me on Twitter.

Next stop – Going to look through my clothing for something suitable to wear to the gym on Friday.  Not buying new clothes. Should probably read through Naturally Thin also.

Car Song – “Baby Got Back” by Sir Mix A Lot  ”Little in the middle but she got much back”

The Writings on the Wall

A few weeks ago I went into Natalie’s room and saw crayon drawings on the wall by her bed.

Cleaned it off and then asked told reminded her we only write on paper and not the walls in our house.

Or any other walls – lest I unknowingly am raising a budding graffiti artist in my home.

This morning I went in her room after she left for school.

The crayon was back on the wall but this time I noticed something different.

The writing was now math problems. Simple ones like 6+6 =


And the answers were right. I know it shouldn’t have but that really made me smile.

Awwww, my little girl is a promising mathematician.

Think this time it may be my fault since the printer paper she usually takes off my home office desk was no longer there. No excuse, but still.

I’m picking up some paper just for her to write on this afternoon and will give it to her to her this evening when I remind her again to not write on the walls.

—-

Want to follow me on this amazing road trip I call my life? Subscribe to the Veep Veep RSS feed.

Can’t wait until I check in again from the road? Follow me on Twitter.

Next stop – Tonight I’m not embarrassed to say I will be watching part 1 of the Real Housewives of New York City reunion special and the premiere of the Real Housewives of New Jersey season. Everyone will be watching those Joisey girls. I can’t wait! Tomorrow I have meetings, meetings, meetings galore before I head out of town again for the rest of the week. Ha! What else is new?!

Car Song – “What You Know About Math” by Ethan and Alan

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